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Bits from my own writing (thoughts wandering through an empty head) that I wanted to explore further and then either delete or write further about. Enter at your own risk…

Talk about gathering experience… something not quite right with that worldview. How do you know what experience to gather… especially in dealing with areas of the unknown.

I can do what I can from my side but there  is always, who and what I am “relating” (two). Experience is of the past, it is dead. I can use it to map the future but it cannot forsee what has changed. Variables that have altered. Experience has created where, what, who I am today. How is it going to create anew. If I have experienced pain in relationship, experience tells me not to go there and yet that is where I decide I want to go.

After an intense discussion with a friend, her saying that we should be getting rid of those that are useless and detrimental to society. Let he who is without sin/guilt/fault, cast the first stone. Us and them. Push the pain away, hide it, disguise it. I find the whole charismatic christian thing arrogant andsuperior. This is what the lord is saying to me. Yhis is what he wants me to do. The castle they build is impenetrable, a mighty fortress of contradictions, paradox and deception.It is neffarious, an intangible, fluid thing that is molded by the mind in the moment to keep them above the rabble. It all seems so perfect, so certain.

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